How to stop toxic relationships from ruining your business

Toxic relationships can wreak havoc on a person’s life and business, and as a business owner constantly on the path of growth and expansion, these relationships can literally make your business drown.

You can recognize a toxic relationship by how you feel when interacting with the person. If there are people in your life who constantly make you feel down after speaking with them or spending time with them, chances are you are dealing with a toxic relationship.

Often, the more you step into your power and grow, the more frustrated these people become and the more they want to pull you back down to their level.

Many of my clients have had such relationships either with their spouses, their parents or their ex-es – and these relationships have had tremendous negative impact on their business and their income potential. Learning to manage these relationships is key to stepping into your own power as a business woman and to create the income and lifestyle you want.

One of my clients used to speak with her mom every week, and each week after speaking with her she felt down, disappointed, frustrated and she lost her momentum and inspiration in her business. She felt an obligation to speak with her mom every week but each time it just drained her energy completely and she had to spend several days to pick herself back up afterwards, putting her on a constant roller-coaster.

Despite the fact that we had talked about setting boundaries and cutting her out of her life during our coaching, it took a while for her to see the real impact her mom had on her, and as a result on her business.

This particular client only spoke with her mom once per week, yet it made a tremendous impact on her. Just imagine how a live-in toxic relationship can affect you and your business.

Because these people often are in your inner circle, I’ve noticed that people often are willing to let them do things to you that you would not accept from other people.

My client was constantly bullied by her mom who would pick apart her business, tell her how it would never work and try to control her. In one conversation she would be nice and ask all kinds of questions to get my client to open up. Then later on, when they talked again, she would use this information against her. If my client was sharing something exciting she was doing in her business, her mom would constantly criticize it and as a result my client would hang up the phone and feel completely down.

If you’ve been reading my blog for a while, you know that I’m all about raising your vibration and feeling good, and that when you feel good you also attract wonderful things into our experience. On the flip side, if you are constantly dealing with negativity and you’re constantly feeling down or discouraged, you will start attracting negative things into your experience. This is how the Universe operates. We are vibrational beings.

Because of this, staying in toxic relationships that are draining you will only attract more negativity into your life in whatever shape or form they show up for you: Money problems, illness, depression or maybe even accidents.

If you are constantly battling a person who makes you feel this way, know that you have all the power to change it. The key is to first recognize what’s going on with the relationship and decide what to do about it. If you’re wondering if you’re dealing with a toxic relationship, you may want to read this article I wrote about how to recognize and protect yourself from toxic relationships. 

Remember, staying in these relationships over time will lower your self-esteem and self worth, because these people thrive on doing anything to you that will make you feel small.

These are some things I’ve found helpful to start taking control of the situation and move on:

  1. Determine if you have any toxic relationships in your life. The way to notice is how you feel after interacting with them. If you feel down after most interactions with the person, likely you’re dealing with a toxic relationship.
  2. Have you expressed to the person how you feel about the relationship and how they treat you? If you haven’t you may want to say something to them like: When you do/say x, it doesn’t make me feel good. I don’t want you to do/say that to me again. This is just a way of setting a healthy boundary. Let them know that if they continue, there will be a consequence. For example, if you are talking to your mom on the phone and she starts to say things that feel toxic to you, you can tell her if she doesn’t stop, you will hang up. Then hang up if it continues. If you are in person with the person then you can simply get up and leave should you start to get uncomfortable. You have every right to do this.
  3. Decide how you want to move forward with the person. Is this a person you would like to cut ties with? If you have tried time and time again to salvage the relationship to no avail, if you’ve set boundaries and the person is not respecting them, it may be time to stop spending time with them and cut all contact, or at least reduce it significantly. I know that often, if this person is close, like a parent or a spouse, making this decision can be difficult because your life may be very entangled with that other person. It is likely that the person you try to cut away from you will use guilt and shame to try to control you into staying in the relationship. This is a trap. Using guilt and shame to control people is manipulative, and is not coming from love, but from wanting to control you.
  4. Understand that you have no obligation whatsoever to continue a relationship that is not healthy for you,  no matter who the person is. This is about your sanity, your health and your business. The cost of staying in these relationships can be enormous with so many negative side effects. Putting yourself first by leaving the relationship may be the best thing you could ever do to yourself and you will see as the toxic part of your life leaves, your will start to attract more abundance into your life.
  5. Know that it’s not wrong for you to leave the relationship if it feels draining and toxic to you, no matter what you’ve been told. You do not have to take this anymore and you have all the power in your hands to start setting proper boundaries and protect yourself.

If you are stuck in a toxic relationship that is draining you and your business, and you are ready to get out, but feel like you need help, feel free to reach out to me here to apply for a complimentary session with me. 

Also, feel free to leave a comment below to share what you are dealing with.

2 Comments

  1. Shavon on October 20, 2017 at 12:26 am

    Sometimes it is challenging to know how to handle those people who you work with that maybe don’t share the same values as you do. It is challenging to not stoop to their level to get even or let them “win”, but it seems they always get found out in the end. My goal is to make sure I maintain my integrity every step of the way. If I see it, I am sure others do as well it will only help elevate my work over theirs. Thanks for another inspiring read, Vibeke!



    • Vibeke on October 23, 2017 at 5:32 pm

      I hear what you’re saying Shavon. I think awareness is everything and loving yourself enough to saying yes to you and believe in yourself when other people try to get in your way.



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2 Comments

  1. Shavon on October 20, 2017 at 12:26 am

    Sometimes it is challenging to know how to handle those people who you work with that maybe don’t share the same values as you do. It is challenging to not stoop to their level to get even or let them “win”, but it seems they always get found out in the end. My goal is to make sure I maintain my integrity every step of the way. If I see it, I am sure others do as well it will only help elevate my work over theirs. Thanks for another inspiring read, Vibeke!



    • Vibeke on October 23, 2017 at 5:32 pm

      I hear what you’re saying Shavon. I think awareness is everything and loving yourself enough to saying yes to you and believe in yourself when other people try to get in your way.



Vibeke's Bio

Vibeke's Bio

I’m Vibeke Schurch, the founder of Success-soul Living® and The 5D Business Model®.

I work with coaches, healers and change-makers to help them grow their business and live life on purpose so they can use their unique gifts to make a difference in the world while creating a lifestyle aligned with their soul blueprint.

Ever since my spiritual awakening many years ago when I healed myself from “chronic” illness in just two weeks, it’s my mission to help you wake up to your inner power and potential. I want to show you how to use your mind to manifest your wildest dreams and create your own heaven on earth while living life on purpose, and serving the people you are here to serve.

In my 20 years as a small business owner, one thing is crystal clear to me: What helps you thrive is not your not your intelligence, level of experience or skill-set, but the programming in your subconscious mind. You can be programmed for struggle and lack, or flow and abundance. In my work, I help you reprogram your mind for success and abundance so you can create a prosperous and fulfilling life living your life’s calling and doing the work you came here to do.