{"id":6498,"date":"2018-03-01T06:00:33","date_gmt":"2018-03-01T06:00:33","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/successoulliving.com\/\/?p=6498"},"modified":"2020-01-15T00:27:20","modified_gmt":"2020-01-15T08:27:20","slug":"understanding-emotional-abuse","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/successoulliving.com\/understanding-emotional-abuse\/","title":{"rendered":"Understanding the emotionally abusive relationship"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"Unlike someone who is physically abusive, the emotionally abusive relationship can sometimes be difficult to detect, define and understand. It\u2019s not as obvious and visible as if you walk out with a black eye. If someone hits you, you know something is wrong. There\u2019s no question. With an emotionally abusive relationship, it\u2019s usually not as obvious.<\/p>\n

Emotionally abusive relationships are far more difficult to uncover and understand because of the nature of how these relationships work and because they can be insidious and elusive. These kinds of relationships can be just as damaging, if not more, than physically abusive relationships, maybe because they are more difficult to become aware of, and as a result you don\u2019t get away from these people and relationships quickly enough.<\/p>\n

For clarity\u2019s sake, let\u2019s quickly define what I mean by an emotionally abusive relationship: It\u2019s a relationship where one of the parties in the relationship thrives on controlling and manipulating the other party. This is often done in insidious ways that are not obvious to the naked eye and masqueraded as love.<\/p>\n

The emotionally abusive may or may not be aware of what they are doing, as they have often learned this behavior in their own family dynamic, where they often were abused or mistreated as children, and they continue this subconscious pattern of behavior. The emotionally abusive usually feels entitled to control the other person\u2019s behavior and will act out if they don\u2019t get their ways or if you don\u2019t abide by their commands. A common trait for these people is also that they don\u2019t respect boundaries, and will continue to violate them even after you tell them clearly to stop.<\/p>\n

These kinds of relationships can wreck havoc on your business, your self-esteem and self worth and tear you down physically, emotionally and spiritually.<\/p>\n

It took me years to discover that I had been surrounded with emotionally abusive relationships for a good portion of my life, and by the time I realized what\u2019s was really going on, the damage was already done.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m not a fan of labeling, but there are times when putting a label on something is helpful to your understanding. Sometimes you need to call a spade a spade. <\/a><\/span>Click To Tweet<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n

I remember when a friend of mine guided me to a book about emotionally abusive relationships. As I read the book cover to cover I couldn\u2019t stop my tears from flowing. Every single word on every page resonated so deeply in my heart and soul as I finally understood what was going on in my relationship and why I felt so broken and confused. It was a very healing moment.<\/p>\n

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I felt validated for my feelings and could see things in an entirely different perspective. I finally understood that there was nothing wrong with me. Everything that had felt so wrong and difficult on the inside, yet so hard to define or put into words was revealed and explained in a way that even though it hurt, made total sense. Now that I saw the relationship for what it really was, I could better a make a decision about how to unravel it.<\/p>\n

Unfortunately many people are in an emotionally abusive relationship without even realizing it. They may just feel like something is not right, and not be able to put words on what\u2019s going on.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s not uncommon for highly functional, successful and educated people to be in these kinds of relationships. In fact, the emotionally abusive person is often drawn towards people who have their stuff together. They like to be able to depend on them, and to be able to draw from their resources and energy. This is because the emotionally abusive person is kind of like a parasite, who quite literally gets their energy from you. That\u2019s why they drain you.<\/p>\n\n\n

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